One time I went on a date to the Olive Garden and I ordered the seafood pasta. I open up one of the muscle oyster things and low and behold there is a tiny crab in there. I freak out and think it’s the craziest thing ever. I keep talking to my then girlfriend about this tiny crab. How hilariously wonderful it is that the little dude crawled in there in the ocean only to become a freaky little part of my pasta. She is very unamused and clearly wants me to shut the hell up about this tiny crab and be a normal person. She is 0% excited about the tiny crab. 
The waitress comes over eventually and is like ‘hey how’s the meal?’ and I’m like ‘awesome, but you gotta check this out! i found a tiny crab in here!’ and waitress freaks out and thinks its awesome. And she is like ‘can I take this to show everyone else?’ and I’m all like ‘hells yeah.’ So she does and everyone else that works there thinks it’s awesome.
Girlfriend SUPER annoyed.
The End.

One time I went on a date to the Olive Garden and I ordered the seafood pasta. I open up one of the muscle oyster things and low and behold there is a tiny crab in there. I freak out and think it’s the craziest thing ever. I keep talking to my then girlfriend about this tiny crab. How hilariously wonderful it is that the little dude crawled in there in the ocean only to become a freaky little part of my pasta. She is very unamused and clearly wants me to shut the hell up about this tiny crab and be a normal person. She is 0% excited about the tiny crab. 

The waitress comes over eventually and is like ‘hey how’s the meal?’ and I’m like ‘awesome, but you gotta check this out! i found a tiny crab in here!’ and waitress freaks out and thinks its awesome. And she is like ‘can I take this to show everyone else?’ and I’m all like ‘hells yeah.’ So she does and everyone else that works there thinks it’s awesome.

Girlfriend SUPER annoyed.

The End.

  1. bluemidnightrose reblogged this from terezi
  2. valgrey09 reblogged this from marianaths
  3. straaythoughts reblogged this from perfectlyunderbite
  4. asslamp24 reblogged this from brink-shock
  5. katdjz reblogged this from symptomsofinsanity
  6. darkmask133 reblogged this from andrewthepoet
  7. kinarius reblogged this from purplerupees
  8. opheliac18 reblogged this from dreaming-thin-xo
  9. true-rinman reblogged this from andrewthepoet
  10. gals-beyond-wasted reblogged this from melanch0lyhilll
  11. dreaming-thin-xo reblogged this from smallerthan
  12. dunkelschwarzundhellweis reblogged this from banefully
  13. smallerthan reblogged this from burn-eazy
  14. burn-eazy reblogged this from dino-hyung
  15. princesskilljoy reblogged this from curseyoumoviereference
  16. sandydandycandy reblogged this from its-a-joke-mkay
  17. disfunny reblogged this from thewinterblogger
  18. thewinterblogger reblogged this from assbutt-in-the-garrison
  19. tominasaelee reblogged this from okaywork
  20. biscuitsandcookies reblogged this from pessimisticmeansrealistic
  21. soviet--unicorn reblogged this from vizzlenub4
  22. pessimisticmeansrealistic reblogged this from the-meganmercury
  23. moonandstars-love reblogged this from asianwearinghoods
  24. silentvase reblogged this from twelvewho
  25. rostambatmangliij reblogged this from maypangs
  26. chronicdaydream reblogged this from blackrabbit44