One time I went on a date to the Olive Garden and I ordered the seafood pasta. I open up one of the muscle oyster things and low and behold there is a tiny crab in there. I freak out and think it’s the craziest thing ever. I keep talking to my then girlfriend about this tiny crab. How hilariously wonderful it is that the little dude crawled in there in the ocean only to become a freaky little part of my pasta. She is very unamused and clearly wants me to shut the hell up about this tiny crab and be a normal person. She is 0% excited about the tiny crab. 
The waitress comes over eventually and is like ‘hey how’s the meal?’ and I’m like ‘awesome, but you gotta check this out! i found a tiny crab in here!’ and waitress freaks out and thinks its awesome. And she is like ‘can I take this to show everyone else?’ and I’m all like ‘hells yeah.’ So she does and everyone else that works there thinks it’s awesome.
Girlfriend SUPER annoyed.
The End.

One time I went on a date to the Olive Garden and I ordered the seafood pasta. I open up one of the muscle oyster things and low and behold there is a tiny crab in there. I freak out and think it’s the craziest thing ever. I keep talking to my then girlfriend about this tiny crab. How hilariously wonderful it is that the little dude crawled in there in the ocean only to become a freaky little part of my pasta. She is very unamused and clearly wants me to shut the hell up about this tiny crab and be a normal person. She is 0% excited about the tiny crab. 

The waitress comes over eventually and is like ‘hey how’s the meal?’ and I’m like ‘awesome, but you gotta check this out! i found a tiny crab in here!’ and waitress freaks out and thinks its awesome. And she is like ‘can I take this to show everyone else?’ and I’m all like ‘hells yeah.’ So she does and everyone else that works there thinks it’s awesome.

Girlfriend SUPER annoyed.

The End.

  1. we-all-dream-babe reblogged this from heart
  2. primean reblogged this from arcanehex
  3. cynthiav33 reblogged this from istillplayhideandseek
  4. turtle-dick-soup reblogged this from arcanehex
  5. teenwolfspaz reblogged this from qtipping and added:
    and then go marry that waitress
  6. corythebatman reblogged this from an-invisible-bubble
  7. stuckinaplane reblogged this from crazystoriez
  8. istillplayhideandseek reblogged this from arcanehex
  9. vicwashere reblogged this from heart
  10. arcanehex reblogged this from baileynight0920
  11. that-damn-bohemian reblogged this from coocookeychoo
  12. evergee reblogged this from heart
  13. jerrysaurious reblogged this from heart
  14. mr-n060dy reblogged this from heart
  15. godmelon reblogged this from heart
  16. funkyflamingogo reblogged this from heart
  17. xbruisedbonesx reblogged this from heart
  18. winsomesoul reblogged this from og-hoody-thuggin
  19. 2-dix reblogged this from heart
  20. burritorollups reblogged this from heart
  21. writing-is-loving reblogged this from heart
  22. insinaaty reblogged this from heart
  23. thequeenofcurls reblogged this from pun-pun1
  24. lavender-unicorn reblogged this from heart
  25. wimismith reblogged this from justice-and-buttz